As many of you know, acclaimed actor Gene Hackman was found dead in his home in Santa Fe, New Mexico in late February, alongside his wife, Betsy Arakawa. One of his three dogs, Zinna, also was dead.
Hackman, who was known for his roles in “The French Connection,” “Unforgiven” and as Lex Luthor in the late 1970s Superman films, was 95 at the time of his death and in the advanced stages of Alzheimer’s, which contributed to his death from cardiovascular disease.
The tragedy in all this is that Arakawa, who was 65, was in good health and was just unlucky to have contracted hantavirus pulmonary syndrome, a rare and oftne fatal respiratory disease passed by rodents. What’s even sadder is that she was scheduled to see her doctor the day of her death, which occurred a week before Hackman’s. This means that Hackman, with his vastly deteriorating brain was left alone for days in what was probably an incoherent and confusing state, one where he had no idea that his beloved wife and caretaker was gone or how to get help, as reported below by the New York Times.
This was one of the many fears I had in my late teens and early 20s as I watched my mother deteriorate from the early onset form of the same horrible condition. I often thought that if anything happened to my dad what I would or even could do to help my mom.
Would my brothers and I be able to take care of her in our early 20s when we were still in college and just beginning our careers on salaries that could barely cover basic living expenses? Sure we had aunts and uncles on my dad’s side that we could rely on but they too had their own families and we would not want to burden them with the responsibility of helping care for our mother, which ultimately would be ours in such a scenario. Perhaps, we would arrange to take her back home to Ireland where she was from, but what would that entail? Would we be able to uproot our lives and move there with no job prospects? We could stay with her family, but that wouldn’t be fair to them either.
I cannot count the number of ways I imagined such a scenario would play out. It’s not that I didn’t want to or wouldn’t have taken care of her should it have happened. It’s a question of would I be able to supply her with the care that she needed and the quality necessary for keeping her healthy.
Taking care of Alzheimer’s patients is a challenging task, even for the best of healthcare professionals. Because of the disease, they are more prone to contracting infections as well as bed sores and physical challenges, especially in the later stages. They also are often delerious and prone to violence. My mother, in her confusion, would often start hitting you if she felt you were doing something threatening, when in reality you were just trying to help. I once saw her shove one of her at-home caretakers into a wall while she was trying to help my mother’s pants down and sit her on the toilet.
Additionally, the cost of taking care of a person with dementia is also a huge toll, with the patient requiring frequent medical scans, caregivers, hospitalizations if sick, physical therapy and, if there is no other option, residential living facilities. This is especially challenging here in the US where there is no universal healthcare.
My mother luckily was more fortunate than Hackman and others. She had caretakers around the clock, except on weekends, so if anything happened to my dad, one of the caretakers would have found her within a day or two at the latest. My brothers and I live on our own but nearby and frequently visit, so we also would have likely found her in the same time frame. It’s an uneasy thought but better than going a week without anyone noticing. I can only imagine the anguish and confusion that Mr. Hackman must have felt, not knowing what was going on or that he was in danger. I’m sure he must have felt some sort of pain, with no idea what it was or how to address it.
According to authorities, there appeared to be no signs that Hackman and Arakawa had a hired caregiver to help out. Many have questioned why he and his wife did not have a one to help out, who may have been able to find and get him help and possibly his wife. Yes, they probably had the money to do so and perhaps they should have, but we have no right to judge. From what I have read, the two of them moved out to Santa Fe for privacy and became even more secluded as we all did when covid occured. The risk of contracting the disease, even after the pandemic ended, was probably another reason why they didn’t hire one, to ensure that Hackman was not exposed in any way in his vulnerable state.
My father is a manager in the lucrative world of IT and made enough to be able to afford the resources and caretakers my mother needed. His insurance was also top tier, so any medical emergencies or exams were often covered with out-of-pocket expenses he could afford. He even went to the trouble of paying for genetic testing, which showed that my mother’s condition was not hereditary, just to put my brothers and myself at ease.
Still, the fact that I, on a journalist’s salary, could not come anywhere close to being able to provide the same level of quality care for my mom compared to my dad often made these scenarios even more daunting. My brothers also were in the same boat, with one living off a teacher’s salary. The other is a team manager for a small software company, and while he probably makes the most of all three of us, it is nowhere close to what my dad can provide.
Sadly, many people are not as fortunate and cannot afford to caretakers for their loved ones. The work falls solely on their shoulders, but they still have to work to make a living, meaning that many may have no choice but to leave their loved ones on their own at times for hours, checking in periodically. While many would condemn such actions, they would do well to remember that these people do not have any choice and until you are in their shoes, you have no idea what your options are.
And such scenarios are only expected to grow as the incident rates for Alzheimer’s and other devastating diseases grow worldwide. Federal, state, local and international governments must commit more to helping families and individuals afford help to ensure their loved ones are safe and do not end up in a precarious situation like Mr. Hackman. My condolences to his loved ones, as well as those of Ms. Arakawa.
In honor of both of them, I have made a small donation to a CaringKind, New York City’s leading expert on Alzheimer’s and dementia caregiving. Here is the link below for those who would like to do the same. For those outside of the city, please look online and donate to any caregiver charities you find. It could help save a life from enduring what Hackman went through for a whole week alone. Thank you.
John R. Fischer 
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